My coffee recipe is as fine-tuned as my potting mix—seriously, it’s like I’m Dre in the kitchen, dropping the perfect blend: a dash of sphagnum moss, a sprinkle of peat moss, some cocoa chips, and creamer and sugar calibrated with Ice Cube-level precision. I sip my brew, repot my plants, and blast NWA, feeling like Eazy-E with a watering can and a bag of perlite. Honestly, my monstera is basically MC Ren—chill, tough, and always thriving in the back. My coffee’s so bold, even DJ Yella would spill the tea. My plants and I are both straight outta Compton—or maybe just outta peat moss, but hey, express yourself!